looking for work is fkhsadlfhadfhladhfladhli!!!!

looking for work stresses the hell out of me.. the fact that i’ll be one of the thousands of pinoys who are jobless gives me the creeps… but when i think about it, i have to find something that will be worth sticking out for.. something that i really want to do and that compensates me well so that i wouldnt feel that i am actually working..

i like what i do now… thats something that i have realized after teaching for two years.. as of now, even with my newly found library skills (hehe), i still think that teaching and being with kids is the only thing i know..

i have tried to move out of my comfort zone by applying in a big school but “they will call me”… well i sure hope that they do.. because i like to teach.. its freakin’ amazing that i am at this point in my life when i have finally realized that this stuff is what i  want to do for the rest of my life.. the catch is that i will be an “out of school teacher” starting this april..

i just blogged about this so that i can somehow take these thoughts out of my mind even for just a sec =)

to my teacher friends… help me get employed! hahaha

YES MAN!

well aside from making me laugh..the movie awakened my spirit..starting today.. i am going to say yes to every opportunity that will come my way.. at 21, i feel like i havent lived “the life” yet.. so to get the most out of it.. i have to try to do everything… to get a taste of the life.. so that in 20 years from now, i’ll feel like i have done so much.. life is reallly too short for everything but you have to start the ball rollin right? hehehe

im off to my dad’s lunner.. (lunch and dinner) its his birthday tomorrow.. and to all my chinese friends and those who practicing the chinese tradition.. happy chinese new year.. =)

oh just one more thing.. im so happy with my family and the one im with.. hhmmmmm… happy happy joy joy!

happier new year!

my 2008 was wonderful..well i am generally a happy person with no fuss and worries… so it was a good year for me. work was good, family was great, friends…awesome as usual and my heart.. happier than ever..\

no resolutions for me though.. i dont believe that i have to enumerate the stuff that i would want to happen with me..my life.. i’ll just do it.. taking the coming year, a day at a time.. life is too short to be dictated at..hahahha i wanna live my life as free as i can.. enjoying every minute to the fullest and making every second of it count!

happy new year guys! all the best for 2009! happy new year!

pangs

    When I was in high school, a teacher asked us to write about our feelings on a sheet of paper. So I wrote what I felt. I have always been very “vocal” about my feelings when it comes to writing so I let it all out. The next day, the teacher discussed the summary of the activity to the class. She gave out general comments that it was about school, friends and the likes. Then she blurted out that one student wrote about something that was too “mayabang” for her. Guess whose writing was that! MINE!!! That time, I was so angry about someone who was so dependent and thought that he needed to fix up his life and stand up on his own feet. That was my feeling… She asked us to write about it and that was what I did but she judged it. And although she didn’t tell my name, we both knew that, that was me. I was humiliated. If that’s the proper term for it given that no one really knew about it. I was hurt. I felt betrayed because I opened up and then she had to judge and conclude without really knowing why I even said or wrote that for that matter.

I just remembered that story once again because in one way or another, the bad judgment was given to me once again. I am a person who is really bad with first impressions. The saying, first impressions last, does not go well with the aura or the kind of personality that I have. Although it has a bearing, you really have to know the person before you try to pick an adjective for him in your head. Well not all people see it that way and I am definitely not here to please everyone.
So after a very long introduction here goes a description of what happened and how I am feeling right now. Change is constant when it comes to work and I am just fine with that. Being given another kind of work load is just okay and I am accepting it, though not whole heartedly, I am still gonna face the new challenges and get the work done. What I am ranting about is the reason why I was given a different work load than what I expected. For me it was based on a very shallow basis, emphasis on the shallow. I have such high respect for this person but I guess she just “felt like I didn’t know what I want as of now”. And that judgment was made without even talking to me. If I will base my reaction right now on what I am “feeling” then that would be… hmmm… she didn’t really trust me or my capabilities. I always look like I am playing, that everything’s easy and light but I am more than that. I have been with you for a year and I accepted everything that you have given and I know that my students learned from me. You, giving me the “pinaka light” load didn’t help much. I know what I want and I am pretty sure of what I want to happen in terms of my career. I was growing but you didn’t give me that chance now did you? I am not mad and I will try to not let our professional relationship suffer. I know that you won’t get to read this but I just want to let it all out. And unlike before, I am not afraid of how people will judge me. I know myself better than you do. I am taking this as positive as possible. I’m gonna make my students the best batch ever. I am gonna make my last year with you as productive as it can get. A piece of advice, feeling is different from knowing. With the age and position, it will help if you see things in a different perspective. Be the one in my shoes, see how you’ll feel. It’s just like I have been stepped on.

people power post

I
started this day with a silent prayer…in my mind, I was wishing that when I
get home gma would have come to her senses that the filipino people are not a
bunch of complete morons that she can just tell lies to all the time. On my way
to MOA with my family, we saw buses of people being picked up to go to the pro
gma rally in manila. That was in the north harbor area. A streamer was placed
at the side of the aircon bus which says, ”we still believe in you pgma”.
That just sucks big time! A lot of things run around in my head during my trip
to moa. I was happy that I got to see the ”hakot” and that I proved that pgma
is such a — well what would you call her? I wouldn’t want to be charged by
calling her malicious names so lets just put it this way, she makes  my brows
unite and my ears together with my brains conspire to not believe a word that
she says. At the dpwh office in manila, the buses stopped. A group of people
were there probably waiting for the ”hakot”. I’m gonna give you a reason,not
that its needed, to believe that they were indeed just paid to join the rally.
The people were from the north harbor, the place were a lot of housing projects
were made. So we all get the picture of their living conditions. They were
riding an aircon bus. I saw four buses that were loaded with people with the
streamer. These people won’t rent an aircon bus just because they want to show
their support for gma. Not that I’m making them feel or look little, its just
that they can’t even make it through the day with what they’re earning and then
they will get an aircon bus! plus it was already in the news that those who
will join the rally will get 200 pesos and free lunch…well who could resist
that? What’s happening in this country, specifically with the government sucks big time! I can’t help but feel cheated and
robbed… Well we were all robbed and cheated in one way or another by the
leaders of this nation. well, that’s a good headline…”pinoys robbed by
govt.”

eco blog

I went on an eco adventure trip…not
really the back to basics type but I enjoyed the perks of the outdoors. It’s
really nice to be out of the mall for a change. I got to enjoy with my
”date”…=p la mesa ecopark is a good alternative dating place plus you get
to help preserve the park with the 50 pesos entrance fee… The place is also
good for exercise -walking and jogging most specially. The place is nice for
family get aways and activities… I liked the place that much that’s why it
looks like I’m promoting the place already. Well, it feels good to be there.. I
never knew that I could row a boat and actually make it move left and right,
forward and backwards. It was fun! And I would do it again and again…
Sometimes, all we need in our lives is a little more adventure, to add spunk to
our everyday lives and to recharge us. KC Conception is right when she said
that its different when you’re already working and earning your own money, it
gets more tiring..

thoughts and stuff

updating my blog is my way of letting people know that i am still alive… so here are some of the stuff i’ve been busy doing… i have work and it has been fun. people there are okay and it seems that i have not been that far from blumoon cause they’re pretty same…the talks and the founed stuff… you know what i mean you guys! i do miss blumoon… A LOT but i cant seem to find time to make a clear sched for a day out with you guys.. im reviewing for LET on my own…i’ve been getting 70 - 80% score on the tests…i still have much room for improvement… my founed1 and 2 sucks thats why i have to learn a whole lot… i barely have a month of review to go…im keeping it positive… despite my busy sched i still manage to take a break and decided to spend it watching movies… i have watched fantastic four and transformers and harry potter… to give you a peek of what i thought about the movie i will let you read on my thoughts. for fantastic four it was good..i liked it and it may be because of bias since lately i have been undeniably fond of superheroes which is quite weird but then again i liked it and loved it and wished that there was more because for me it was bitin and sort of short because the movie is really good. as for transformers, the girl was hot even if she was dirty. it is a really non-bloody violent type of movie that i would not let my kid or my nephew hans watch because for sure he will imitate it. bumble bee was cool though. last was harry potter. it was good and dark. i particularly do not like dark movies because i want to see the actors.it gets me bored when the setting is dark but its still okay since its harry potter and the setting needs to be dark. i was not as excited as when other potter movies were shown. what excited me nowadays is the coming of THE SIMPSONS MOVIE…i love them!!!! and i will watch it when it shows and i will buy jolibee kids meal because of the simpsons stuff that goes with it… =)

ahhhh.. feels good to release my thoughts once more…=)

first…

on saturday, it will be the first day of the rest of my life….faith and fate brought you to me…im the happiest, the luckiest and the most blessed =)

i wish..

i wish they all know that im the one who makes you happy…

that im the one who takes care of you and loves you dearly…

that im the one that you want to see and be with all the time…

i hope they all know how happy we are…

but for now, i’ll be okay with just the two of us knowing all these… =)

whatta!

Things can be so f___ing frustrating… just when you thought you got things under control something changes and messes up the whole thing… I am a fan of logic and questioning. If I don’t get answers, logical answers for that matter, I don’t believe. Readers, bear with me, my mind is messed up and my frustration meter hit the ceiling. I am trying to cool down but I still cant find the answers to my fuzzy questions. I also never believed of the statement that “that’s just the way it goes”. I know that life isn’t perfect and mishaps happen… just didn’t think that it would all fall down on me like that. maybe I am over reacting but if you were in my place right now, your blood will rise up to your head…